A couple of weeks ago, I wrote an article about the fear of success, because I felt that the fear of success was more dominant in my life than fear of failure.
So obviously, I had to ask myself, “What am I really afraid of? What would happen if I was to succeed?”
This forced me to define what success meant to me, and what would my life be like if I was successful.
Defining what success means to me did two things for me. First, it clarified the major dreams I have, and it gave me a definite direction in which to move.
Second, it brought to the forefront, the fears and the insurmountable obstacles that have kept me from achieving those dreams.
Having the fears and the obstacles exposed in this manner enabled me to face my fears and analyze them, and take a closer look at the obstacles.
What I found was very unexpected and I was pleasantly surprised. What I found was that the insurmountable obstacles were nothing more than the figments of my imagination and excuses for self sabotage.
As for the fear, well, it turned out to be my greatest ally. You see, there is someone in my life, who is very good at manipulating, and they had me believing that I was a loser and will never amount to much in life.
As I faced my fear of success and turned it into my greatest ally, I had to go through a lot of soul searching and getting real.
What I found out, once I was willing to accept it, was that I had abdicated ALL my responsibilities in life to this master manipulator, and I was allowing them to guide me into failure. Again and again.
When I realized this, I made a commitment to being responsible for ALL my actions. And to break the cycle of manipulation, I adopted the phrase, “yeah, whatever…” and it worked like a charm.
Slowly but surely the spell was broken, and I finally had the courage to break free. This person is still in my life, but their magic doesn’t work on me anymore. I see all the buttons clearly as they get pushed, but the circuitry behind them has been rendered useless.
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Have you defined what success means to you? If you have, then you know that you are on the right path. But if you don’t have a crystal clear definition of what success means to you, then I urge you to get naked and come out clean. It is the best thing you’ll ever do for yourself.
Here is My Definition of Success
1. Pay off ALL my debts, personal and private, in full.
2. Live and work from wherever I want, doing whatever I want.
3. Travel to wherever, whenever, and however I want.
4. Practice my Faith regularly.
5. Help other people do the same.
I realize that in order to achieve the above, I would have to be rich. But, that is another post.
What is your definition of Success?
Share it in the comments below, or on your own blog (preferably with a link back). If not, at the least, I challenge you to do it for yourself.
I know exactly how you feel Rasheed… I seem to attract manipulative people into my life all the time that want to keep me down or see me fail. It is sooo depressing for me to see that and to experience it! I adopted the same saying years ago and also the act of “Walking Away” from things and leaving everything for the other person. This was something I had to change as I was ALWAYS starting over with NOTHING except more experience under my belt and a SLAP IN THE FACE! I am learning to take a “Stand and therefore Stand” now.
I think the “Yeah… Whatever” has turned into “God give me Strength”. lol
